Dating Advice For Guys

 

 

I know not all guys are built like Clark Kent and many are shy when it comes to women.  I’m going to give you some tips when it comes to dating that me and many other women find attractive.

1.  Be Assertive

Even the hardcore feminist likes an assertive guy.  I was at the movie theater recently and two high schoolers walked in the front door.  Instead of waiting back not knowing what to do, the guy walked forward to the counter and said “Tickets?”  I wish I had a boyfriend in high school that was assertive like that and knew what was up.  Don’t pick her entree for her, but hold doors, hold her hand first (JUST GO FOR IT OR SOMEONE ELSE WILL).  Seriously bro, you do not want to be in the friend zone for good.

2.  Call her on the phone

There’s something about hearing a man’s voice that releases our pheromones like YOWZAA.  I really don’t know if it releases our pheromones, but… we like it.  It’s so easy to send a text these days.  Call a girl up.  If you are nervous, have a piece of paper ready with what you want to say.  You can even have the “Well, I have to let you go now because…” written down.

3.  You CAN be funny

Think you’re not funny?  Think you’re too shy to say anything?  False.  Being funny comes from being observant.  After an end of the year pot luck at my school-age-care job, I was carrying some hot dogs and one of the dads goes “Uh oh!  Someone got the leftovers!”  I laughed and said “Uh oh!”  I was like, that guy is observant of the pot luck and he commented on it.  What a funny guy.  It didn’t take much.

Observation + comment = laughter    C’mon, Jerry Seinfeld and Louis C.K do this for a living.  You can even practice with your friends and family if you are shy.

4.  Spontaneity

With the internet, there’s no reason you shouldn’t have cool ideas for dates.  Surprise her!  Also, there’s no reason you should ever not know where you’re going.  Smart phones, people!  Part of Assertiveness…

5. Compliments

nuff said.

6.  Be Observant

My friends say I have a super memory.  I might have a larger than normal hippocampus, but really I think it’s because I pay extra attention in conversations.  I’m a good listener.  Be mindful to what a girl says.  Then you can bring it up in the next conversation with her and BLOW HER MIND.  “How’s your sick kitten doing?”  “Oh!  (surprised you remembered) She’s much better after some medicine from the vet.  Thank you so much for asking.  I like your hair today by the way.”

Being a Musician

I’m a musician and I get caught up in the “what if’s” of the future of my craft or the “I’m not as good as this guy or gal” when really, I need to focus on the point. Playing music is a gift and I need to remember why I play it in the first place. I LOVE TO PLAY IT. It’s my passion.

Plus, the journey is the destination. Improving on your instrument and as a person in general, is a life-long journey. I am only in competition with myself and the future will work itself out if I work hard.

Oh… here’s Gavin Harrison, one of the best drummer’s in the world, enjoying his passion.

Love and Lust

I think I figured out what love is this past week, or maybe it was lust.  What do you think love is?  When people are like “It’s just something you feel” I didn’t believe them.  Maybe I believe them now.  I think when you literally love the mannerisms of the other person, their little quirks, the way they talk… that might be love if that gives you butterflies.  Or that might be lust.  Hmmmm.  I may never know.  I’ve never been in love, but someone gave me that feeling and I know I want someone to give me that feeling again.  No, this wasn’t sex.  Ha.